Guilt

I've been feeling a lot of guilt recently for being so upset about what I don't have in my life because I do have an awful lot. I've got a wonderful husband who I love very much, I have a gorgeous, healthy, intelligent son, we own our own home, which is filled with nice things, I have a degree, a job and a great family, so really, what right do I have to be so miserable about life to be signed off work? I know a lot of people who don't have what I have, and I feel like they must look at me and wonder how I dare complain about my lot.

When I was young and thought about my life, I always saw it as being filled with children. I thought that when I found Mr Right, we'd be able to have children to share our love with. So the fact that I have a husband and a child, doesn't take away from the fact that my plans feel incomplete. I went through pregnancy and birth and raising a child, but not with him. I want him to feel the joy of recognising your own expression in your baby's face. Maybe I'm asking too much and I should just be grateful for what I do have, but perhaps it's harder to be that much closer to your happy ending, only to fall at the last hurdle.

Or maybe I should stop worrying about it and accept that something will upset you if it does and there's nothing you can do about it. As much as you should focus on the positives in your life, sometimes it's hard to do when they don't add up to the result you once wanted. You just have to learn to live with it eventually. Hopefully it won't come to that though.